The Feelings Are Mutual

Tonight, Daniel asked me if we can do whatever we want during the day. I told him that even during the day, there are things we have to do, but there are also times when we can do what we like.

He told me he'd like to have a day when they and I just play; I told him I thought we could have such a day, and I would like it very much.

Then he said, "Daddy, when you leave, I get sad."

I assured him that I'm also very sad when I leave. I had no idea before I was a parent, how hard it would be to leave for work when there are children at home. I've probably blogged about this before; when my father would go to work when I was about three or four, I would throw myself at him and beg him not to go, and he would apparently ignore me, which completely blew my mind (I wasn't sure he could hear me...). But now I get it; it's so hard to leave the young'uns when you go to work that it's probably less traumatic (subjectively) to shut the whole process out. When I leave in the morning, Daniel sometimes sits on the porch eating his rice crispies in rice milk, waving his hand like a jalopy, and it's very hard to drive away. If Ian were not on his way to Kindergarten and Madeleine were not in bed, it would be harder still.

(May 7, 2010)